A Bad Body Image Day

Today has been a pretty rough day as far as body image goes. I just spent all my time wallowing in self-pity, feeling ugly. I know it’s irrational, but I can’t help but feel ugly when it seems like I’m the only one who is without a boyfriend. I would really like to meet someone, but it’s kind of hard right now when everyone is home and away from school and because I don’t have a job which would allow me to meet people. All I can do is sit back and wait patiently for that special someone to come around.
Today was another meeting with my dietitian. Every day I meet with her, I like her more and more. I’m slowly becoming more comfortable with talking to her. She is sometimes more of a therapist than a dietitian. Because at my last weigh-in I was down about a pound and a half, she bumped me back up to 4 supplements. Unfortunately for me, though, I haven’t been doing the two that I was told to. So, now I’m at risk of gaining extreme amounts of weight in this coming week by sticking with four supplements in hopes of them lowering the amount I have to take at my next appointment. Oh well. I just need to look at it as that I’ll be one more step towards getting to do yoga and going on a vacation when I reach 105 lbs. As much as I hate the idea of gaining weight, I really like the idea of getting my privileges and independence back as my weight is replenished.
A nice counter of today’s boredom was last night. I went out to the hookah bar downtown for the first time. I decided I’d try the hookah. It was okay, kind of weird, though. I didn’t do it very much because I got a little dizzy and it gave me a slight headache. Even though I didn’t have much fun smoking, it was really nice to get to go out with my friends. Each time I go out with them, I’m building my friendships a little bit stronger which is really nice. It’s amazing the wonders of knowing you have good friends there for you can do. On a totally unrelated topic, a couple days ago my mom and I got those new gel manicures. I got mine done on saturday, I think, and they’re still intact! I would totally recommend this to anyone who is tired of manicures chipping after one or two days of wear. Not only do they not chip, it makes my nails super strong, and they feel a lot thicker than a normal manicure. Well, you’re probably getting bored reading about my stupid life, so I’ll let you go. Check back tomorrow!

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One thought on “A Bad Body Image Day

  1. I’m so sorry you feel this way! We all have our hangups about our body image — I guess that’s all a part of being a girl (or even human, period). Have you tried writing a list of all the things you DO like about yourself and looking at it whenever you feel this way?

    Btw – I lovee hanging out with my friends too! It’s kinda hard for us to all get together on a regular basis because of our busy schedules now but we make it work & it’s amazing 🙂 & I need to check out those gel manicures; I’m a nail polish addict & I hatee when it chips like 5 hours later!

    – Nandi @ officialgirlsonlyclub.wordpress.com

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